Reptile ramps and overpasses

Leaping lizards in the HOV lanes! It's crazy traffic out on the patio this afternoon.

The anoles are using the horizontal cross pieces of the wood privacy fence to scurry from one condo patio to the next at three different levels. The lizards travelling on the top board of the six-foot fence seem to be the largest reptiles, and they do lots of neck-poof bling-displaying to make sure everyone knows they are Very Important Lizards. Sort of like Hummer drivers.

The mid-level lizards crisscrossing on the four foot horizontal seem to have the most personality. They vary from bright green to copper. They skulk, twirl their mustaches, swish their capes, and add dramatic pauses to their commutes. They seem glad not to be driving their wife's minivans, and pretend they are cruising in the batmobile. They leap into the shrubs when a Hummer lizard decides to take a power detour on a vertical fence post.

Very small lizards venture out on the lowest cross piece from behind the shrubs. They are mostly stressed and brown in color. They travel as fast as they can, but still look as if they left their coffee Go-cup on the top of the car and completely forgot their briefcase. Some of them still have toilet paper stuck on their shoe. When a lizard on the next crosspiece up does a Vincent Price impersonation, the low level lizards leap down into the ground cover.

All this patio needs is a live rush-hour traffic helicopter report....and maybe a tow-truck.

© 2008 Nancy L. Ruder

Skylark on the silver screen

I've lost my bet. Buick Skylarks have been in movies according to the Internet Movie Car Database. A '64 Skylark appeared in My Cousin Vinny in 1992. A Skylark of unknown vintage appeared in Nine To Five in 1980, which fits as the Skylark is the sort of car for getting a single mom to her job. Both of these Skylarks were older than my 1996, which isn't a bad car, but lacks star quality and a Pepsodent smile.

Dionne Warwick, Burt Bacharach, Hal David, and I have to leave now. We are buckling our seatbelts, and warming up our vocal chords. Join us! There's room for one more in the backseat:

Do you know the way to San Jose?
I’ve been away so long.
I may go wrong and lose my way.

Do you know the way to San Jose?
I’m going back to find
some peace of mind in San Jose.

L.A. is a great big freeway.
Put a hundred down and buy a car.
In a week, maybe two, they’ll make you a star

Weeks turn into years.
How quick they pass.
And all the stars that never were
Are parking cars and pumping gas

Do you know the way to San Jose?
They’ve got a lot of space.
there’ll be a place where I can stay

I was born and raised in San Jose
I’m going back to find
some peace of mind in San Jose.

Fame and fortune is a magnet.
It can pull you far away from home
With a dream in your heart you’re never alone.

Dreams turn into dust and blow away
And there you are without a friend
You pack your car and ride away

I’ve got lots of friends in San Jose
Do you know the way to San Jose?
Can’t wait to get back to San Jose.

Elevator to the Gallows

When I drive the Buick up the North Central Expressway, after an evening at the Dallas Angelika Film Center, the Cosmic Cinematographer is not inspired. I imagine the Cosmic Cinematographer tinkering with the scene, the lighting, the atmospheric conditions, but still being dissatisfied. The technicolor film is tossed out in favor of black and white, and a light rain shower with some lightning is ordered . The dramatic High Five interchange loops and arcs overhead, but the '96 Skylark just won't work in this motion picture, no matter if I put improvised Miles or Coltrane in the cd player.

I bet no Buick Skylark has ever had a role in a feature motion picture. Not sure how to research this notion, and wonder if anyone know a good source for identifying the automobiles in movies.

Went to see "Elevator To the Gallows" at the Angelika this weekend with guy friends. Over coffee afterward we discussed the vehicles as much as the story and the 1957 film's powerful visual effects. I thought it would be easy to drive home in the Buick, do a bit of Googling, and find out about the cars in Louis Malle's first feature film. Alas, http://www.imbd.com/ doesn't list the cars with the stars. Shouldn't the credits read

Directed by Louis Malle; written by Noel Calef; starring Jeanne Moreau, a 1950 Chevrolet DeLuxe Styleline Convertible AND a 1956 silver Mercedes 300SL Gullwing?

Back to the Future

Read some of my email when I got up at five. Some were sent at 6:44 and 8:44 a.m. Tues. I always laugh when I get emails from the future. I've tried to adjust the clock for my computer and my Comcast, and it hasn't made any difference. It really doesn't matter. It's not like I'm involved in insider trading. The emails were really sent about 1 a.m. and 3 a.m.

Was aware of the sound and aroma of my coffee maker automatically making my morning coffee at some point, but went back to sleep. Woke up again at 5 a.m. Geez. I thought I set the coffee maker for six a.m. Now I'm getting coffee from the past to go with email from the future. Where is Michael J. Fox with that DeLorean? This afternoon when my most precious class decides to play "carwash", I will imagine myself in the DeLorean instead of the Buick. Wonder if the DeLorean has a cupholder.

And yes, I'm really posting at 06:11 a.m., Tues., Oct. 12, 2004!