Was it the mysterious missing Dietrich?

I didn't know what I was missing! The boys are back in town. The empty nest is good. I like it a lot. Still, it is lacking in that pungent aroma of petrified sweaty socks left in the backseat of sun-baked cars, and that infusion of youthful-yet-jaundiced editorializing mist. The guys are weaving in and out of the old homeplace, and I'm enjoying it.

Once in awhile, under certain oppressive atmospheric conditions, the Buick interior smells of a fruit smoothie spilled on the floor mat in the last millennium. My youngest has taken a summer job making nutritious and delicious blended frozen fruit drinks at an unnamed franchise. Since fruit smoothies are one of his four basic food groups, along with bagels, pretzels, and green chiles, this is a perfect job for a short time.

I expected the clientele would be Starbuckled IPod junkies and Birkenstock wearers with laptop computers and lots of airbags in their Volvos. True, that is a form of reverse snobbery, even if I don't usually eat DQ Char-broiled belt-busters. Please don't tell that I was profiling!

My son reports that his semi-gelid fruit concoctions lure exotic car owners. A guy came in, he says, driving a Ferrari...

..."And do you know what, Mom? He let his dog sit on the front passenger seat ...... Mom, do you understand? DO YOU GET IT??? This is SO totally wrong. A dog on the seat of a $300K work of art!"

You would think someone drew a mustache on Michaelangelo's "David" and dressed him in a kilt. And was it Blue Dog? No.

Guess who just got back today?
Those wild-eyed boys that had been away
Haven't changed, haven't much to say
But man, I still think those cats are great

(Always thought that was Springsteen, but it was really Thin Lizzy. )

My oldest apprises me of the mysterious "Dietrich", the alleged driver in the 162 mph crash of an Enzo Ferrari on the Pacific Coast Highway last February. He brings me up to speed, so to speak. This major news event must have happened when my radio station was conducting an annoying pledge drive. Or maybe that was one of many weeks I was so disgusted with the Bush administration that I let the Hawaii 5-O theme by the Ventures play continuously in lieu of radio news ...

Seems that a Swedish ex-con millionaire did or didn't let an entity known only as "Dietrich" drive this acme of automotive design. The story has pseudo-Homeland Security officers and the"anti-terrorism force of the transit system".

The LA Times reports Eriksson said he was a passenger in the Ferrari, which he said was being driven by a German acquaintance he knew only as Dietrich. One witness told deputies that the Ferrari appeared to be racing with a Mercedes-Benz SLR northbound along the coastal highway when the accident occurred about 6 a.m. west of Decker Road. "It took out the pole, and part of the car went another 600 feet," Sheriff's Sgt. Philip Brooks said. "There were 1,200 feet of debris out there. "Eriksson told authorities that "Dietrich" ran up a hill toward the canyon road and disappeared. Brooks said detectives are far from convinced they have the whole story. Eriksson "had a .09 blood-alcohol level, but if he's a passenger, that's OK," Brooks said. "But he had a bloody lip, and only the air bag on the driver's side had blood on it. The passenger-side air bag did not. My Scooby-Doo detectives are looking closely into that."Maybe the 'driver' had a friend who picked him up. Maybe he thumbed a ride," the sergeant added. "Maybe he was a ghost."

Maybe Dietrich went to get a frozen fruit elixir! "Book 'em, Danno!"

Should you need to look at the wreckage, go to http://www.wreckedexotics.com/special/enzo/ . If you want an Enzo Ferrari photo for your computer desktop, click to http://www.dieselstation.com/archive/Ferrari-Enzo/index.shtml
If your car has occasional locker room sensory flashbacks...